hipsters

okay, let's talk about hipsters. they are everywhere. underground has never been more mainstream in my life.  i will admit, my closet consists of many skinny jeans and weird striped cardigans but, in all good fashion fun, i kind of love to hate them.


i just read this article on askmen.com  -- please don't ask me why. just know that the hubs sparked this convo. yes, he wears v-neck shirts and looks gooood in his skinny jeans. i make him wear them, mostly but i'm pretty sure he likes it too.


 so, the article started out like this...




..."the kids are trying hard to out-bizarre each other with calculator watches, sweet bikes, no-style hair everywhere, look-how-untrendy-I-can-dress parties, and gender-snapping poser-dom."


now you know this is gonna be good. if you are major hipster.... stop reading.

(you should read this picture - the evolution of the hipster, ha!)


so, let's dive into the article, shall we?


I'll give you just the best high lights...

Hipster Trends We Hate: Grooming

Greasy Hair

 Greasy hair serves merely to make a mockery of the battle for sanitation that men have faced for much of their existence and only relatively recently conquered. In other words, if you can afford shampoo you should use it.

For a tousled hairstyle without the grease, ask your barber for one of 2010's men’s hairstyles that's longer in the front and shorter on the back and sides. Then, make a part and sweep all your hair irreverently to one side. Much better.

Handlebar Moustaches

After all, to the fairer sex, a thick moustache is the equivalent of having a bad pickup line on your face, so, consider sporting these styles only when you’ve decided to embark on one of your celibacy chapters.

To use your masculinity to attract rather than repel women, try a facial hair style like an all-over stubble (the five o’clock shadow kind) or shave it all off and let her see what you’re working with.

Hipster Trends We Hate: Apparel

Ironic T-Shirts And Sweaters

How to be ironic? For starters, not through your apparel. This category consists of T-shirts, sweatshirts and sweaters featuring pictures of deer, wolves or indeed any animal imagery,sports team logos from decades past,Sesame Street characters, The Great Gatsby prints, or quirky appliqued prints like Christmas trees.

Skinny Jeans

 Essentially, they are the male equivalent of a corset, but much, much worse, because while a corset plays up a woman's natural curviness and looks sexy, your girlfriend’s jeans merely constrict your body and do absolutely nothing to enhance the male physique. On a man, skinny jeans are just wrong, so just say no to wearing them. 

Hipster Trends We Hate: Accessories

Nonprescription Eyeglasses

Chunky, oversize eyeglasses from another era, or made to look as though they were from another era, are hardly a universally flattering accessory to wear on your face; yet, every hipster owns at least one pair. What's more horrifying, however, is that many of these individuals don't actually need prescription eyewear. 

Childhood Accessories

There's nothing more depressing than seeing a 30-year-old man toting aTransformers lunch box around or adorning himself with pins his little sister would be embarrassed to wear.